so what its 16 days late.
2018 was an incredibly filled miraculous year for me. I can’t believe it just thinking back on what has happened.
I started 2018 in a broken relationship, no sense of direction when it came to my career and 50% of liquids in my body was alcohol. Not exactly a great start to life is it. I struggled for the first few weeks to figure out exactly what i’m doing with my life, but the more I stopped to really think and pay attention to where I am at, what I like and don’t like the more I felt a desire grow in me, to change the direction of my life.
Continue reading 2018 Reflection →
I don’t know what this, if this is what the true meaning of healing is.
I have carried so much shame in my life. I have hated the things I have done, I hated the thoughts I had and the words I said, I have hated the things that have been done to me and the things I allowed to happen to me. At some points I have hated myself..
Continue reading Compassion and Healing →
(can’t help noticing my writers juices comes up at the beginning of the year)
For the last few days I have been thinking about this, literally, the phrase has been going through my mind, I m a black girl in a white man’s world. You hear about the world is a man’s world and how white people have priveledges etc. As an African girl who pretty much grew up in a stable African country without much exposure to the huge racism and disadvantages African American and other African people have been exposed to, I never really contextualised it. It was always just another historical phrase I hear, understand but never really think of it for more than a couple of minutes.
Now here I am, a year into my career as a solicitor/business owner and I’m really feeling like a black woman in a white man’s world. My blackness is so obvious and almost more obvious than my presence…if that even makes sense. Every room I walk into, I’m not just noticed as the black woman who just walked in, but now I have to really prove that I deserve to be there, that I know what I’m doing (after I prove I’m the right person, not the help).
I’m aware that most women have to deal with the invisible glass ceiling, it’s frustrating and its real I’m ashamed to say in my naive youth I used to think that just talk but its real, and unfortunately, I’m not immune to it either. But you know what really frustrates me about being a woman in a man’s world, especially this world, it the idea that you can have it all. But let’s face it, you cant have it all..the minute you become a mother, which most of us do, you really CANNOT have it all, no matter what you think the man has the upper hand, put simply he can be at work till 12 minutes whilst you have to be home with the kids by 6pm?
But I have to say, the journey is rather interesting.